I don’t know how to explain this season of my life without sounding dramatic, but I have been feeling really tired. Not just physically tired. More like tired of talking, tired of explaining myself, tired of keeping up with people, tired of pretending I have energy when I don’t.
And when I feel like this, my first reaction is always to isolate myself. I stop answering messages as much. I spend more time in my house. I convince myself that I don’t want to see anyone, that I’m better alone, that people are too much, that everything is too much.
And sometimes being alone feels good. But then the day goes by. And suddenly, the silence doesn’t feel peaceful anymore. It starts to feel heavy. My thoughts get louder. I start overthinking things that probably aren’t even that deep. I start feeling sad for no clear reason. I feel disconnected from everyone.
And when I finally go out. Or I meet a friend. Or I have a conversation. Or someone simply asks me how I’ve been and actually listens. I feel better.
Maybe I needed to be reminded that the world is bigger than my house. Bigger than my thoughts. Bigger than the little sadness.
I think sometimes we isolate because it feels easier than being seen. Because being around people means there is a chance they might notice we are not okay. And sometimes we don’t want to explain it.
I’ve been realizing that there is a difference between choosing solitude and running away from connection. I think everyone should know how to spend time with themselves. I think we all need alone moments. But I don’t think we are meant to live completely closed off.
Because people need people.
I need people.
And that’s not always easy for me to admit. I like to think I can handle everything by myself. I like to act like I’m independent enough, strong enough. But the truth is, sometimes I need a hug. Sometimes I need someone to sit with me. Sometimes I need to hear someone laugh. Sometimes I need to talk about nothing just to remember that life is not only about what’s happening inside my head. Connection brings me back to myself.
So if you’ve been isolating too, I get it. But please don’t let yourself believe that you don’t need anyone.
You do. We all do.
We need to be held. Heard.
So this is your reminder (and mine) to let people love you. Let them see you. Let yourself need connection without feeling weak for it.
Because needing people does not make us fragile.
It makes us human. 🖤
